Do Better.

Elliot Rodger is not an anomaly.

Elliot Rodger is not a one-off.

Elliot Rodger should not be dismissed in death for his cruel deeds of murdering young women and a fellow man this past weekend on the City College of Santa Barbara campus in California.

While very few men have the gall and brass to commit mass murder because of their sexual frustration, the entitlement issues are bubbling below the surface of many men who feel that because they are different from the men that women are attracted to. They tout themselves as “nice guys” or in the sick case of Rodger, son of an assistant director of the Hunger Games movie, a “Supreme Gentleman.”

I can say this with certainty because I was one of those guys once upon a time – still working through it today. If you’ve followed me on the web for a while, you know my story – teased as a fat kid, insecure about everything. Instead of figuring out what was good about me and playing that up, I fell into a trap of hating myself as well as women who chose guys who were altogether different from me, and hating those cats as well. I’m 32. Elliot Rodger was 22. I’m thankful to say that murder never crossed my mind, but I still spent a good 10 year stretch of my life blaming everyone but myself for my inability to date/have relationships/have sex regularly. Took a while, but the common denominator theory was right – it’s not always everyone else, it has to be you some of the time, if not most of the time.

That’s where guys like Elliot Rodger and other misogynists fail to mend their ways – they continue to go on thinking because they’re special snowflakes, that women should leave the macho, attractive, smooth, slick guys alone and come get with them. What they fail to realize is the guys who get women had to develop their gift of game. Some cats are indeed born with it – more power to them.
But the bottom line is this – no man has a right to any part of a woman’s body or anything else in her possession. It’s their choice and their choice alone to talk to you, give you their contact info, date you, have sex with you – consent reigns. It’s the law. Should be, anyway.

Men, we simply have to do better. All of us. I include myself in this, I’m still learning and trying to put some things into practice. Women are tired of our shit and while you may not think much of feminism, it’s the lone defense they have against us since governments worldwide have failed with protective legislation from brutism. Stop acting like women are your property, stop acting like they owe you sex because you’re nice. Learn to have a personality, care about women beyond their bodies.

If we can do that, we can avoid more incidents like that of Elliot Rodger’s rampage – acts of desperate bitter men who find out the hard way that they are entitled to absolutely nothing.

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